Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Ok, you can pee yourself.

Linna (after the pee incident) playing with her pal
Brae from Australia at the Interlace in Singapore.
My 3-year-old and I experienced a "first" together in Singapore today. Remember when I said I would NEVER be that mom who encouraged her kid to poop in an airline seat? Well, I feel like I came pretty close today.

After school, we were waiting for the bus to take us to a friends' place for a swim/play-date (it's literally a quick 10-minute ride), when Linna said, "I have to go pee pee Mama." Normally, this kid has SOLID bladder control, but at this point she was dancing around like she was going to explode. According to the app on my phone, our bus would be arriving in 3 minutes, and there wasn't a restroom in our close proximity. I calmly told my 3-year-old to "hold it", just as I've said to her a million times before. Normally, she can, but this time, I watched the pee start to trickle down her leg. I knew I had to think fast.

"Alright, sit on the curb and pee... in your clothes... it's OK.", I told my 3-year-old, as I looked around to see if anyone was watching, while sweat streamed down my face.

For a split second, I seriously thought about holding her over the garbage bin so she could relieve herself... but that might draw attention to the situation. For a moment, I wished she was a boy so I could quickly put her in the corner, and block her public display of urination from those prying, JUDGING eyes. However, even the failure to flush a toilet is illegal in Singapore, so I can't imagine what type of death sentence we'd receive for my 3-year-old's public urination.

As I searched through my backpack for something... ANYTHING that could help me in this situation (I'm still not sure what I was looking for), a mom with an American accent walked by and asked, "Can I help you with anything?". Trying to look like I have my sh*t together while frantically searching through the backpack for ANYTHING absorbent, I stood up and exclaimed, "Oh no, I'm fine! But thanks so much!". Thinking back on this now, I'm sure she saw my sweaty, disheveled, and frantic state, all while watching my 3-year-old with pee dripping down her leg. Thank you random, American woman... I now wish I would have asked if you had a spare diaper.

With little time to react to the situation, I told my 3-year-old to sit on the curb to relieve herself. That's right Singapore... I am an unprepared mom without a "helper", and my kid peed on your sidewalk! I'm so sorry.

I watched as our bus came around the corner, and within 30 seconds I removed Linna's pee-soaked school uniform, and threw on her hooded towel that I had in the backpack.

That's right, my child pissed on a sidewalk in Singapore, AND walked onto a public bus wearing only a towel. I wish you could have seen the looks I received as I put Linna into her swimsuit on the bus, while trying to stuff her pee-soaked clothes into my backpack... ALL while pretending the whole situation was completely normal.

When we finally arrived at our friends' place, I explained the situation to my fellow mamas here in Singapore, and it really brought me back to reality. This sh*t happens all the time, and as a parent you just have to roll with the punches. However, I'm still 110% convinced that I would never encourage my child to poop in her airplane seat. I promise.

1 comment:

  1. Hi , a generation ago, that was completely normal for a kid in Singapore or Malaysia. Boy or Girl it does not matter. Society allows them to relieve themselves at a spot, as long as it's near a drain or some tress/bushes away from walking path. Chinese moms would teach their kids to say "excuse me sprit (insert name) " before relieving themselves, fearing that their pee/waste would hit a tree spirit or other spirit & arouse their wrath. So what your kid is doing is perfectly Singaporean! A generation ago.